The girl they call Jeannie
Looks like Mussolini
She's rat-a*sed and out on the pull
And there on the dance floor by the light of the jukebox
She waltzes with Waylon from Hull
And she unzips her blouse as
He lubricates his trousers
And now she's undoing his tie
And if he stays sober
He'll get his leg over
Which is better than a poke in the eye...(but not much)
And he gets her name wrong & spews in her handbag
But she don't care, she's blind to his faults
They're dancing till dawn & the jukebox keeps playing
The premature ejac............ulation waltz.
 
It starts to resemble a
Furtive knee-trembler
Dancing with passion and feeling
She kicks off her knickers and gives 'em a flick as
They fly up and stick to the ceiling
And he's too polite now
To mention outright how
He's half her considerable size
And she hopes he's so pissed
He might not have noticed
She's chafing his ears with her thighs.....up sideways
He sings Karaoke, he came out of chokey
Last week, but she's blind to his faults
They're dancing till dawn & the jukebox keeps playing
The premature ejac............ulation waltz.
 
And he bums fifty pence for
The condom dispenser
She carries him out to the car
And she puts the lights off and he rips her tights off
They're at it three beats to the bar
And just like Jacques Cousteau
He dives in with gusto
And she suggests something obscene
And hopes with persuasion
He'll rise to the occasion
And he prays that his Y-fronts are clean...
                              .....and she's had nine
Pints of Dogbolter, so she thinks he's John Travolta
And she don't care, she's blind to his faults
They're dancing till dawn & the jukebox keeps playing
The premature ejac............ulation waltz.
They're dancing till dawn & the jukebox keeps playing
The premature ejac............ulation waltz.

The Premature Ejac... ""ooh I'm sorry
That's never happened before""... ulation Waltz