This could be the start of something relatively interesting
This could be the start of something new
This could be a way to break the ice before it gets to melting
This could be the start of me and you
(We'll get through this together)

I'll sing you songs about bigger boys
I'll hum you hymns about broken toys
I'll mouth you melodies 'bout your Mum
(Don't mean it, lovely woman)
I'll serenade you until you're sick
I'll take the piss and I'll take the mick
A half hour of talking out my bum
(I'll make it all up as I go along)

I'll sing you songs about things I hate
I'll hum you hymns that involve my mates
I'll mouth you melodies 'bout my kids
(got a boy and a girl and I like them both)
I'll serenade you until you're ill
My lack of skill will be overkill
Now check your underwear for skids
(You dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty sod)

This could be the start of something mildly infuriating
This could be a problem to ignite
This could be a way to ruin morning, afternoon and evening
This could be a flaming back of shite
(It really is believe me)

If you stick around and let me aid you in procrastination
I'll consider you one of the crew
(Honorary naughty ruffian)
This could be the denouement of burgeoning relationships or
This could be the start of something new (something new)

This could be the start of Classic Hymns for Funerals