Oh, you wanna know how I’m doing?
How I look at life and how I view it
What i’m thinking, and what my truth is
Thanks for asking let’s get right to it
Lately I been feeling fine (lies)
Ain’t felt this good in some time (lies)
I think I might be in my prime (lies)
I guess you could say i’m divine (lies!)
If I’m being honest i’m fucking depressed
And I don’t tell no one, I keep it repressed
Got a room full bottles of shit I ain’t said
Because I never talk about what’s in my head
They don’t wanna know, they don’t wanna hear it,
They’ve already heard and don’t wanna get near it
They got their own problems that they gotta deal with
They’ve got their own trauma and shit that they’re healing
So why would talk if I’d just get rejected
And meet the same fate I’ve already expected
It’s not that I hide behind walls I’ve erected
It’s just that within ‘em I feel I’m protected
If you want me open though, I’ll open up
I’ll give it all to you, i’m loaded up
I could go on for like years about all of the shit and the reasons why life’s going rough
I’m open now and I’ll talk about it
I’ll drop my walls and I’ll walk around ‘em
I’ll let you in, yes I’ll allow it
I’ll flood ‘em out ‘til we’re fucking drowning
I’ll make a list and you can count it
Or aloud together and see who’s loudest
But once we start, we can’t stop it
It’s wildfire with no way to douse it
This shit’s busted, it’s not working
And that’s a fact not how I observe it
I can’t even tell you all the times that I thought to myself that this shit just ain’t worth it
“That’s just life man, it’s not perfect”
Shut up bitch, I know, I’ve heard it
But do you really think that the life that we’re forced to live is the one we’re deserving?
The world is dying, and it’s heating up,
We’ve killed off breeds and the reefs are done
Bro, we need change, fuck, we need tons
But the one’s with the power ain’t speaking up
Ain’t doing shit but just screwing us
The rich stay rich it ain’t news to us
Dividing, lying, using us
Beating us down and abusing us
Controlling the media, see what they want us to
Killing each other is what they have brought us to
Got us divided like they fucking wanted to
Blinding us so we don’t see what they’re plotting to
I can’t fucking take it, I’m sick of the same shit
I’m tired of working so hard to not make it
Im fucking depressed and all day I am anxious
And if I don’t do well then I’m where the blame is
I’m fucking broke and six figures in debt
And I got a degree but I can’t get check
I’m trying hardest and trying my best
But i’m so fucking lost, don’t know where to go next
Been trying the music still not working out
Started a biz I can’t get off the ground
I feel like a bum that can’t get off the couch
And the thoughts of my suicide still lurk around
I’m sick of feeling the way that i’m feeling
I’ve got all these thoughts I don’t know how to deal with
I’ve got open wounds I’m still working on healing
But pissed enough to put my fists through the ceiling
I Feel like I’m losing my sanity, like how I’m losing my faith in humanity,
and there ain’t no “ever after” in which I do actually see myself living it happily
I feel like I’m going insane
Tired of playing this game
Tired of feeling ashamed
And like I am locked down chains
I’m tired of deal with pain
And feeling it everyday
I just need something to change
I just need something to change
This what you wanted, I said it, you heard it
These are the reasons that I’m always hurting
You want it, you got it, and I could keep chirping
I could keep going for thousands of verses
Put out 10 thou still keep it moving
Cook for a decade and still keep it brewing
Next time ask me to know what the truth is
Keep in mind this how the fuck I’m doing