I have spent my life
Living as a ghost
In the shell of a woman
In reverie, I exist in a space where I am present in my own body
And here it does not belong to anyone but me
This body, an erasure poem
Void of the praise I would not give it
Is now a place I dwell

Here, I name all my body parts
And there are no bad words
Here, I am the rule and not the exception
Here, my fat is not sacrilege
Is only decoration for a home I am proud to live in
Here, in this wonderland,
My flesh is not carved or covered in a quest for approval
I give myself permission to be
And it is all that matters
In this paradise, I commune with myself
And no one names it sin
I realize how willingly I have named myself damned
And how hesitant I have been to name myself god

This body be a hallelujah
It is a church,
Holy and unscathed,
A trembling indigo morning
That I worship
When everyone is looking


Oh, universe
If I cannot manifest this existence
Let this sleep be an endless one
Let me lead a life in any realm
That allows me to show up as myself