So welcome back to this metal attack
With a human losing their soul tonight
That's a fact!
They cannot scream, they cannot hope or dream
Tonight's proceedings do not work like that!

I'm so sorry!

Good doctor, do not be!
It's the chance of a lifetime
To get to see me! Now sit down, little one
This is going to be fun! You will be a star
Then you'll burn like one!
Now let's see my name in lights, my dear
You'll wish you'd be up there with me
Hope you put up a good fight, my dear
No one's stopped this celebrity!

Please keep calm, there's no cause for alarm
He's a really sweet guy
Though he means you harm!

I've got style, I've got grace
Now get out of my face!
For it won't be long until you buy the farm!
Don't even try, I am such a swell guy

I just don't think it's right to
Make a little kid cry!

No one asked you, Alphys, we're rolling
Quiet please!
It's the role of a lifetime tonight
They die!

Now please don't be afraid, my dear!
You're swell, you're fab, and I'm beauty
They'll throw me a huge parade, my dear!
Once machinery kicks your booty!

Okay, okay, just calm down! I made Mettaton
I know how to work around him!
All you have to do is-

Uh uh uh! Doctor, no cheating!

No no no, dear doctor, it's my show
And we can't have you interfere!
Stick around, come and watch tonight's show
Same time, same channel, I'll be here!

Come call me when you want actual dramatic
Tension! Have a nice pilot! Goodbye!