Hoping for a boy.
Then we could do what boys do.
Football,
Soccer,
Baseball,
Basketball.
We could do it all
And we would too.
Hoping for a boy.
I bought a blue toothbrush.
Just before he was born.
Oh baby what a rush.
Of course he had no teeth yet, but
I was going to be ready.
I was going to be ready.
I was going to be the best dad, the best dad.
I was sure I was ready.
And when he was born.
He looked up at me,
Sweet innocent eyes
Placed in my hands,
Little tiny feet
And I sighed.
He smiled up at me.
The smile was wry,
And sweet and so wide.
I looked down at him.
I started to weep.
And I said.
I got you boy.
I got you boy.
I got your back
Because I’m your dad.
I got you boy.
I didn’t want a girl
Girls are too complex
Girls are too pink
And I had had enough of that nonsense
I knew if I had a boy
He would know just how I’d think.
You grew up so fast
No longer my little boy.
Didn’t I protect you?
Didn’t I keep you safe?
Do I now torment you?
Am I replaced?
Hoping for a boy.
Just tell me, do you hate me?
Then we could do what boys do.
No mom.
Football, soccer, baseball, basketball.
I don’t hate you.
We could do it all and we would too.
Strangers, for no reason.
Hoping for a boy.
I tried to see this through.
Hoping for a boy.
Somehow I lost it, I lost it.
Hoping for a boy.
I don’t know what to do,
For you.
I got you boy
I got you boy
I got your back
Because I’m your dad
I got you boy.