Well, I met an armadillo out in Amarillo
And he asked me for a light
I said, "Hey, where you going?"
He said, "I don't really know"
And I said, "Brother, I've been there twice"

When he hopped up in the shotgun, then he started rollin' one
I said, "We gonna get along fine"
The armadillo with a doobie and a coldie in a koozie
Had me drive him to the county line

And I know it sounds crazy
But please believe me, baby
I swear that's where I was last night

Well, I would've pulled over, kicked him to the shoulder
But I seen he had a pistol on his hip
He said, "No turning back, we got coppers on our ass"
"And I'm gonna get away with this shit"

Well, I didn't even think to ask the armadillo
Just what it was that he'd done
All I could do was drive and pray that I survive
'Cause a arma-damn-adillo had a gun

Don't try and call my bluff
Honey, you can't make this shit up
(Three, four)

Met an armadillo out in Amarillo
And he asked me for a light
I said, "Hey, where you going?"
He said, "I don't really know"
And I said, "Brother, I've been there twice"

And then he hopped up in the shotgun, then he started rollin' one
I said, "We gonna get along fine"
The armadillo with a doobie and a coldie in a koozie
Had me drive him to the county line

And I know it sounds crazy
But please believe me, baby
I swear that's where I was last night
An armadillo with a doobie and a coldie in a koozie
Had me drive him to the county line

And I know it sounds crazy
But please believe me, baby
I swear that's where I was last night