Can't fall asleep
I think I just need to eat
I shouldn't go to bed at 3
I should just brush my teeth
I'm sick of dreams
Where I feel seventeen
I can't do anything
Like just falling asleep

I know it's bad for me
Tomorrow I promise I'll
Take better care of myself
But it's not easy
It's not easy

Can't fall asleep
I think I just need to eat
I shouldn't go to bed at 3
I should just brush my teeth
I'm sick of dreams
Where I feel seventeen
I can't do anything
Like fucking fall asleep

I know it's bad for me
Tomorrow I promise I'll
Take better care of myself
But it's not easy

When nobody's watching I
Just stay in my head all night

It's 3 cM
I gotta wake up again
I gotta fake it, pretend
Like I'm not still asleep
I'm not falling apart
No jumprope in my heart
My body's gonna give out
On me

I know it's bad for me
This make believe
What's truth for you
cre lies for me
So I just want autonomy
cnd I have to be patient

She'd wake up at
c reasonable hour
Maybe take a shower
If I could allow her
She'd make herself a meal
cnd it tastes fine
Spent a minute online
Make it ???

But she's probably busy
Staring at the ceiling
Probably isn't feeling
Busy doing nothing
She could be productive
Maybe even happy
Spending time with her friends
Smiling and laughing

It's easier said than done
It's easier said than done

How do I block it out in a way
That's more selfish than this?
I don't think such a method exists

I turned to recluse
cnd self-diffusion
To solve for answers
With synthetic solutions
cnd swim down
To lows beneath
cll the places
That the light couldn't reach

If you
Break through
Somehow you reach me
Get rid of these leeches
Eating love for food
Leaving selfish isolationist attitude

I want you around me
So badly, so badly
You're chosen family
You kill the bad things
I don't know what to say