One day, I wasn't doing anything
When I fell down a cave
Got washed out by a wave
In May

I tried
To swim back to shore
But the sea was a whore
So I died

But then I woke up
It was all a dream
I jumped out of bed and I started to scream
What a stupid bastard cunt of a dream this has been

And my wife said
Why've you gotta say such nasty shit?
Because I'm a nasty mother fucker!
It's plain to see
I'm the nastiest fucker to walk this earth
I don't give a fuck if your feelings are hurt

You shouldn't have to ask why
The answer is so fucking simple
I'm such a horrible cunt
I don't care what you want
If you don't like it
You can go and fuck yourself

Because I'm a nasty mother fucker!
The nastiest fucker
And you can go to hell
You stupid cunt-faced wanker

Nasty
Nasty
A nasty mother fucker

Sometimes
All that you need
To keep the demons locked out
Is to stand up and shout
Fuck you all, you stupid wanking bastard cunt-faced cock suckers

If you can't say it with some swearwords
It's not worth saying at all
So if you want to know
Why I've gotta say such nasty shit
Because I'm a nasty mother fucker!
A nasty mother fucker