Dropped acid, Blue Oyster Cult concert, fourteen years old
And I thought them lasers were a spider chasing me
On my way home, got pulled over in Rogersville Alabama
With a half-ounce of weed and a case of Sterling Big Mouth
My buddy Gene was driving, he just barely turned sixteen
And I'd like to say, ""I'm sorry"", but we lived to tell about it
And we lived to do a whole lot more crazy, stupid shit

And I never saw Lynyrd Skynyrd but I sure saw Molly Hatchet
With .38 Special and the Johnny Van Zant Band

One night when I was seventeen, I drank a fifth of vodka
On an empty stomach, then drove over to a friend's house
And I backed my car between his parents' Cadillacs without a scratch
Then crawled to the back door and slithered through the key hole
And sneaked up the stairs, and puked in the toilet
I passed out and nearly drowned but his sister, Deedee, pulled me out

And I never saw Lynyrd Skynyrd but I sure saw Molly Hatchet
And the band that I was in played ""The Boys are Back in Town""

Skynyrd was set to play Huntsville, Alabama
In the spring of '77, I had a ticket but it got cancelled
So, the show, it was rescheduled for the ""Street Survivors Tour""
And the rest, as they say, is history

So I never saw Lynyrd Skynyrd but I sure saw Ozzy Osbourne
With Randy Rhoads in '82 Right before that plane crash
And I never saw Lynyrd Skynyrd but I sure saw ACDC
With Bon Scott singing, ""Let There Be Rock Tour""
With Bon Scott singing, ""Let There Be Rock Tour""
With Bon Scott singing, ""Let There Be Rock!""