My strawberries have gone rotten in my garden
Can you help me with that at all?
Mr green thumb
I've heard you've got a knack for fixing up a patch off land that refuses to grow

Oh they say my soil ain't good enough
My soil is poor in nutrients
But I've been adding nitrogen
Until it can't take any more

And I've been journaling
This may not seem like gardening
But they still say that's important to grow

Oh all my friends are coming over
Coming over to my place to stay
And when my friends come over
They will all laugh in my face

My brain has gone rotten in my garden
Too much resting on my laurels
Not enough time pulling up weeds

Oh feels like a lobotomy
Well I don't know how that feels
But this gardening business
It does nothing for me

So Mr gardener
Come garden for me please sir
I've tried all of the tricks in the book
Except for planting the seeds

And I've been lying here
Pretty hard work and I'm full of fear
That my lying here
It will never cease

Oh all my friends are coming over
Coming over to my place to stay
And when my friends come over
They will all laugh in my face

A musician or an artist
A poet or a chemist
I don't want to be a gardener

I'll be a drunk or a nitty
All alone I'm not too picky
But I don't want to be a gardener

I'll be a stranger to my lover
As long as I don't hold a mower
I'll be stressed, I won't be a gardener

I'll be a fisher or a fashion icon
I'll be a terrible father to my future son
Because I won't look after my garden

And all my friends are coming over
Coming over to my place to stay
And when my friends come over
They will all laugh in my face