Augustus Gloop, Augustus Gloop
The great big greedy nincompoop
Augustus Gloop, so big and vile
So greedy, foul, and infantile.

Come on we cried
The time is ripe
To send him shooting up the pipe
But don't dear children be alarmed
Augustus Gloop will not be harmed
Augustus Gloop will not be harmed

Although of course
We must admit
He will be altered quite a bit
Slowly wheels go round and round
And cogs begin to grind and pound
We'll boil him for a minute more
Until we're absolutely sure
Then out he comes
By god, by grace
A miracle has taken place
A miracle has taken place

This greedy brute
This louse's ear
Is loved by people everywhere
For who could hate or bear a grudge
Against a luscious bit of fudge