Time was when an American about to go abroad would be warned by his friends or the guidebooks not to drink the water. But times have changed, and now a foreigner coming to this country might be offered the following advice:

If you visit American city,
You will find it very prett
Just two things of which you must beware
Don't drink the water and don't breathe the air!

Pollution, pollution!
They got smog and sewage and mud.
Turn on your tap
And get hot and cold running crud!

See the halibuts and the sturgeons
Being wiped out by detergeons
Fish gotta swim and birds gotta fly
But they don't last long if they try

Pollution, pollution!
You can use the latest toothpaste
And then rinse your mouth
With industrial waste.

Just go out for a breath of air
And you'll be ready for Medicare
The city streets are really quite a thrill
If the hoods don't get you, the monoxide will

Pollution, pollution!
Wear a gas mask and a veil
Then you can breathe
Long as you don't inhale!

Lots of things there that you can drink
But stay away from the kitchen sink
The breakfast garbage that you throw into the Bay
They drink at lunch in San Jose

So go to the city
See the crazy people there
Like lambs to the slaughter
They're drinking the water
And breathing (cough) the air