Old Man Morris got it bad last week
Fell for the widow from across the street
She clipped him in the ear, she told him what's what
But he couldn't keep his mind off her honey pot

Silly old man with his teeth all gone
Poking his nose where it don't belong
She's a rose all right but she's got thorns
Working on stony ground

Lost his heart to Buxom Betty
Throwing out the compliments like confetti
Left and right, he threw them all around
But everything was landed on stony ground

Silly old man with his teeth all gone
Poking his nose where it don't belong
She's a rose all right but she's got thorns
Working on stony ground

Widow's got a brother, henchman too
A pair of gorillas from the London Zoo
They call on Morris and they tell him what's what
But he can't keep his mind off her honey pot

Silly old man with his teeth all gone
Poking his nose where it don't belong
She's a rose all right but she's got thorns
Working on stony ground

Kicked him in the head, poked him in the eyes
Shoved him in the gutter and there he lies
Dripping with blood, dripping with snot
But he's still dreaming of her you-know-what

Silly old man with his teeth all gone
Poking his nose where it don't belong
She's a rose all right but she's got thorns
Working on stony ground
Working on stony ground