I know I'm paranoid
But I still think they might be out to get me
I'm in bitter need
Of a new kind of enemy
I'm going agoraphobic
My ass sits idle
But my mind is hardly stoic
My blood pressure keeps on rising
There more I keep depressing
And denying

Me name sake said that hell was other people
Now I know how dealing with the petty
And the feeble
Can make you evil
From a babe's mouth is the candy that I steal
I'm climbing up and down on fate's oblong wheel
You're strong in the bow, but weak in the keel
I'll look you in the eye
But behind the scenes is where I deal
I'm making excuses for the seams that are ripping
The only thing I hate more than digging
Is begging!

Back in the day, it was so perfect
I had my purpose
It was all very worth it
But now my little victories
Are just empty calories
I'm in bitter need
Of a new kind of enemy
Something harmless but scary
To keep them in line
To keep them wary
A point in time that can't be carried
A memory that can't be buried

There is no solutions
Just the problems that I'm selling
They'll make you feel better
Even though you're aiding and abetting
So quit your whining
Eat some pills for your stressing
Go buy some more debt and plan a
Pretty June wedding
Make lots of kiddies
Because the gravy is never ending
Have everything you want
As long as the banks keep on lending
I've made my sell
And I hope I'm not offending
Because the only thing I hate more than digging
Is begging!

I want to wear your face like a condom
I'll never win