In the cool of the evening
I don't know the reason
But I long to touch
Some young tender hearts sometimes
So I go to this party
With a bunch of me hardies
They say don't get too cute
Don't get too smart
'Cause these people are crazy
They toot coke and drink wang-foo
And they talk in some crazy tongue

There's a slit-eyed lady
Sayin', don't you be so stupid
I may look old, but I'm still good fun
Still good fun
Yeah, I'm still good fun

Well, I ain't that choosy
I'll flip-flop with a floozy
If I figure there's no strings attached
But sometimes I lose my feet
Underneath the back seat
And I have to fly my heart at half mast

Well, this old bitty
She was smart and she was witty
She was really out of control, you know
It was stumble or fall
I had my back to the wall
I didn't know whether to bet or win, place or show

[Chorus:]
Welcome to Chinatown, she said
I'm gonna lay your body down, she said
I ain't no queen, but I'm wearin' this crown
She said,
Welcome to Chinatown
Welcome to Chinatown

Well, she shimmered and she shook
What she wanted, she took
She shook like some rickshaw ride
She stuck her fingers down my throat
'Til I almost choked
I thought I'd gone to heaven and died

Well, she took me by the ear
And said, what do you want to hear, boy
You want to hear those crazy old lies
I said nothing you can say girl
Can drive me away
Just check my complexion
Make sure I'm still alive

[Chorus]

Welcome to Chinatown
Welcome to Chinatown