I've done my three in the BSAP
And that's enough for the likes of me
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

I've been on patrol so long and far away
That the local girls look better by the day
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

I came to a river and I couldn't get across
So I jumped on a *bleep* cos I thought he was a horse
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye ay ay
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

I spent the night with a dirty old witch
Now I've got a funny little itch
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

She was built like a house all square and solid
And her *bleep* hung down like a pair of subtle wallets
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

She's a big fat girl
Twice the size of me
With hair on her belly like the branches of a tree
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye ay ay
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

She was standing the kitchen pummelling dough
And the cheeks on her *bleep* went chuff chuff chuff
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

She was lying there with her *bleep) all bare
Every little wiggle made the troopers all stare
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

I *bleep* her standing and I *bleep* her lying
If she had wings I'd *bleep* her flying
Kum-a-kye ay ay ay ay
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye

Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye ay ay
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye (Kum-a-kye)
Kum-a-kye kum-a-rookie kum-a-kye