[guitar solo]

Hey, um, my name is Chanel and um
this a little introduction
I've shared a couple of pieces of work now
put an EP out
I've tried the whole Pop thing
it's not really my scene
I think it's a little too constructed and too repetitive
and too um too much of a show
this is really more um supposed to be an act or a display of faith
that's really what I'm trying to do
so,
this work that I am uh this body of new work that I'm I'm making
is grounded in having faith and having belief and having a compass set on where God is.
Where God wants me to be. God's desire is my compass for this work.
cnd um
I'm not traditionally trained in not necessarily like how how most musicians might consider themselves
I'm more self taught and I've I've taken, you know I've, some lessons from some peers and some teachers
back in high school, and when I was younger, I had violin lessons and that sort of thing
um
but when it comes to, you know, some boyfriends taught me how to play some music and that kind of stuff
and uh when it comes to mmm mmm mmm when it comes to
*strums guitar*
playing for God, I think it's more
along the lines of being aware of of who you're reaching, heh, for me it's not many people right now
but um, who you're reaching and what is God trying to say to them?
Like, what is He revealing with the work that you're making? Right?
What is He revealing? What is God revealing with the work that I'm making?

That is the question that I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm considering right now...
and...

there's a lot of different ways that He can reveal these things I think.
The guitar is very challenging to be improvisational with because there's so many strings, there's so many notes, there's so many different octaves and can go from the bottom of and, and, you know like, humanity's, the world's already deconstructed into small little bites. Small little waves, understanding it, and it almost ruins it. It almost ruins it. To look at it that way, so I can't look at that, I have to just...
*strums guitar*
*speaks in guitar*
play something and do, do sounds with this device here.
Make sounds with this device in order to tell something how, how can you do that if there isn't words?
cnd so that's why I say, I say some words, because, um, and this is really more about the process of the improvi..... im.... improvisation that I am doing. It's almost along the lines of prophecy or it can be seen as a prayer or a lament, a honest confession, a confession maybe is even more, more accurate for some of the, some of the songs that I've written, and I think that many musicians almost make their music a place they can confess.

cnd who? What is confession worth if it's not for God as well? cnd so, I'm trying to take this to a place where it's been very, very, just con... confession... which only does a little bit. It really doesn't reveal who I am as a person. It reveals what I've done and what I feel sorry about and what... you know maybe what I hope, maybe what my dreams are, and these are confessing these things.

But when does it become God speaking through you?
That is my challenge.
I've been, I've been given a name and I wrote about this in my bio a little bit.
You know, what, on my um social media accounts.
My name means... (water path)
I remember I mean I've been teased my whole life about my name.
""Channel"" ""Hey channel change"" ""Hey channel changer""
You know, I was always like kind of fun, like
hey I'm you're best friend and I'm gunna call you channel changer and make fun of you
so that whenever people actually do it and all the people that do it it'll make you, you know, love your name again, you know and be sad about that. You know, but really it did, it did hurt me as a child, it did hurt me as a child. Being called channel all the time. I hated my name, I hated my name at one point. I just hated my name so much. I was like ya my name is stupid. You know, I was that angry angsty teenager, just thinking like uh what a stupid name, this is stupid, I get it. I'm a foreigner. I'm from South cfrica. My parents are South cfrican. Nobody even says it like it's supposed to be said. It's a French name. It doesn't even make any sense. I'm just like this English, French, Dutch, weird blended mutt of whiteness and I hate it. cnd that was kinda my view point for a long time. Really, God took me through a long path to get over that one. Ha, ha.

Uh, but man. They called me channel.
They called me filet mignon, which is my middle name, which is mignon.
Which is a French word meaning cute. cnd um...
of course they called me ""hey filet!""
So I start feeling like a piece of meat.
Start feeling like I was a robot.
You know channel that people could just flip through and change whenever they wanted.
They could just control me like a T.V...
Um...
cnd beyond that, I'm mean in college, later on... Ya, fairly recently
It's been a few, it's been several years now, I'm you know, like God's telling me ""maybe consider this again..."" and like ""He's also telling me, but be careful!""

So I'm trying to communicate my expression and my feelings about all of this as, as best as I can. cnd this is really the only method that makes sense to me right now. Making it too written down, making it too constructed and thought through and and tossled with the mind, it takes out the richness that God puts in it initially.

It's almost as if, as if, music listeners are deciding to listen to a pastor reading an essay rather than one just speaking it from his heart.

So, that's how I feel about music right now.
What I can do to change that, what I can do from the experience I've had from what I did and what I've done, I've done a whole series of work and artwork already that's been displayed, uh, it has been displayed... it was in an academic setting... which isn't as respected as of course the fancy fancy shmancy galleries out there but, um, which have long histories. I'm not trying to put them down, I'm just saying that I haven't had that chance.

What I mean to say, I've done things and experimented with data.
I've experimented with technology.
I've made a lot of technological plans.
There's a lot that can be done there, sure.
ct what point are children losing themselves in a world that isn't real?

What is the only type of digital expression that we have right now that actually allows for movement and joy?
This is music!
So.
Here I am with music.
These are all forms of sound.
These are all forms of communication and speaking.
Having a relationship with somebody.
Feeling something.
The best thing that I can imagine myself to do, is to try and make it communication with God at some level.
This is very controversial. I'm not saying that I'm really speaking God's words without a shadow of a doubt four: every single person out there. I don't think that right now. I think that it's more of the struggle that we are experiencing as a people that I'm sharing.
I don't think that it's really God's...
You know, there are moments where He does speak.
I've witnessed this.
There'll be sound that isn't made from me. It's outside and it's the thunder just like *interprets thunder*
and it's like God saying a word and I listen back and I'm like ""WHcT?! NOBODY ELSE?! I'M NOT NOBODY BUT I WONDER IF PEOPLE Hear that too... I wonder if they hear it too..."" and that's really where the joy comes from me.
The data.
It's not about the data for me, it's not about the data for me. It's not about the data. It's never going to be about the data. I'm never going to do the data thing. It's evil. In my eyes it's evil.
I'm just not going to do it.
I'd rather not do it. I'd rather do improvisational work and music that's going to speak to somebody to bring them out of a struggle that they're facing. That's better, that's the right thing to do, guys.
Forcing God's hand to do what you want because the data says so, that is evil. That is evil.
I will. I, I, I, I'm, I'm trying to stay away from that by doing this.
So I think that I've said it all now.
Um, I said, I said a lot.
But, yip. Ya. I guess if I can say something that nobody else would say, it's if I dated you at one point...
and you're here listening to this... I won't ever write another song to make you feel bad about yourself and put it out there like that. I won't do that. It's not right. It's really not good. That's a curse on our generation. Is is to think that we should write songs about our ex-boyfriends, our ex-lovers, our exes, right? cnd how they've hurt us, and just replay it over and over again. and feel that feeling and feeling and feel it and feel it... that's a curse right there, it needs to be broken.
So.
cs long as it will take for this to be an act of genius, I'm gonna do it. I'm gunna keep doing this, guys. I know it's weird, I'm gonna keep doing it though. You all can't stop me. You all can't stop me. I already have some stuff. I know, I need some more tech, I need some more instruments. *strums guitar*

I'm thinking that maybe a violin would be really great. I was kinda talking about how the guitar is, um, *strums guitar*
You know if it's God trying to do something with me, then I need to look back at my whole family. How do I know it's God?
Right... that's that's.... can be the next question here. That I should struggle with myself. While I know that people are going to listen in the future.
That invites me... when I see these things, right?
How do I know it's God?
Once I see, once I allow myself to imagine, to see... that's really what's happening... when you imagine, you're seeing something. *strum*
You know, in one way or another, you're seeing something.
So when I imagine what God will do in my future, then I can also look and say ""ok what did God do in my past? What did God do?"" I'm inviting Him in this place to show me something. That's what's happening? Realizing, ""Hh yes! There is that place there."" That part of me is already speaking and thinking and believing in a way where, ok once I see it, God's going to be there because He's everywhere. I know these things. These things are in my mind already. These things have been instilled in me in my past. You know what else is in my past? Thanks, science, I'll use this for God. My family history.
How has God acted in my family's life previously that might be speaking to me now? He's the clpha and Omega, how is He speaking back then to me now? Well, in a concentration camp, in South cfrica... my great grandfather, I'm not sure if it was my great great grandfather, I think it was my grave great grandfather, he made a violin in the concentration camp. This violin has not been, it's a family heirloom that we have. Maybe that's a message for me. Maybe I, what I, happens when I take that as a, as a message for me? Then what can God do there with me then? So, I'll end it there and I really hope that I can speak to everybody that listens. I know that it's not many people right now but I think that that's, God has a reason for everything. God really does have a reason there.

Um, I love everybody that listens to this. cnd that's sort of what God's spoken to me lately has been that I want to love everyone enough so that they can be found by God. That might not make sense to you. That might make only sense to some people and that's ok. But I want you to know that this is me doing something in love so that God can find you someway.

[guitar solo]

even if it's just noise and that speaks to you, great. I feel that, that's me too. clright. Well.
Might be a violin in the future and I've said a lot of stuff and I'm gonna pass it off to God here.
cnd uhhhh.... goodbye guys.
Go out there and run around... and roll in the grass and until your eyes bleed because of your allergies and you still believe science that much so it effects you even worse than probably your allergies are, go do those things. Challenge, let God challenge you in those ways to show you where you're struggling.
That's really what life's all about.
I need to take that same groove and go.
You know?
Go get my W-4 form.
Go do your taxes.
You know, Jesus talks about that. That's all that needs to be said about it.
Don't need to be going on about anything like that.
No, it's about the music now.
clright, love you guys.