You are my best friend in the world.
And I hope that you know,
When we hangout together,
It's freakin' awesome.

Playing poker Friday night,
Pyromancing off golf cart races
You think that my sister's hot
I accidentally shot your finger
Off your writing hand oh well,
You get disability.
I broke my leg you laughed so hard
And told my ambulance to stop at the bar.

You'll tell the world I'm gay when you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay

And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way.

You fart and burp in the same key,
And I think your iPod sucks.
You make fun of my hair because yours is.. disappearing.

I've seen your penis you've seen mine
I popped your pimples you
Rubbed aloe vera on my sun burnt back

You went in fits when I shit my pants
You felt my girls' brand new boobs
You asked to suck them she refused
So while you slept I shaved your head
You woke up and told me that I

You'll tell the world I'm gay when you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay

And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I know you know I love you (I fringin' love you dude)
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way.

You'll tell the world I'm gay when you hear me say
That I really and truly feel this way
Not that there's anything wrong with being gay

And sometimes we punch each other in the face
Like when I hit on your mom and got to second base
I'm trying to say I love you in a heterosexual way.