Hey mom, there's something in the back room
Hope it's not the creatures from above
You used to read me stories
As if my dreams were boring
We all know conspiracies are dumb

What if people knew that these were real?
I'd leave my closet door open all night
I know the CIA would say
What you hear is all hearsay
Wish someone would tell me what was right

Up all night long
And there's something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I'm not like you guys
I'm not like you

I am still a skeptic, yes, you know me (yes you know me)
Been best friends and will be till we die
I got an injection of love from the erection
My best friend thinks I'm just humping guys, alright

Up all night long
And there's something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I'm not like you guys
I'm not like you

Dark and scary, ordinary
Explanation, information
Nice to know ya, paranoia
Where's my mother, biofather

Up all night long
And there's something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I'm not like you guys
Twelve majestic lies

Tom has sex with guys

Hey Mark, who here thinks that I look very similar to Tom Cruise?
Thank you, I think so too (yeah)
Like, like Tom Cruise in that movie Born on the Fourth of July? That one?
Where he's handicapped and retarded and stupid, nobody likes him
And he just shits all over himself and he's a fuckin' asshole, hey
That was mean (that's right)
Never attack somebody that shits on himself
Do you guys think it's weird, to shit your pants when you're sleeping?
Not that I do it, but I did it last night and I haven't taken a shower since
And I'm wondering if that's what smells, haha oh poopy, poopy caca haha
Hey I wrote this next song, wanna hear it? 'Cause you don't have a choice
It goes like this

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