It kind of sounds like it's nothin'
But somethin' that happened got me spiralin'
I put out a song about the depression that I'm in
And then...
Nothin' happened
24 streams after two weeks
Which is okay for an artist no one knows at the beginning
But nobody was communicating anything
I thought at least my friends
Would have some kind of reaction
That somebody would be textin' me
Ask if I'm okay after hearin' my song about apathy
Now I'm sittin' here thinkin'
They might not care for me
It's hard to think about it casually
Why is everyone neglecting me?
Myself, my friends, my family
My last relationship
The reason I went to therapy
The universe is testin' my emotional capacity
Constantly at its limit
This might be the death of me
Part of me says "thankfully"
My motivation's droppin'
I'm either feelin' nothin' or everythin' at once
Will I ever get it done?
Cause the way that things are goin'
I might as well be givin' up
Already halfway done with it, I should be goin' on
But what's up with my best friend?
Why doesn't he respond?
Why does this keep happening?
I just wanna talk!
That's really all I want!
I don't care if we meet up or text or have a call
I just want to have my friends be friends for fuckin' once
Why am I so lonely?
Why am I so lonely?
My friends don't know me
They say they care
But show me nothin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
We talk one moment
They say they care
Then we stop talkin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
My friends don't know me
They say they care
But show me nothin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
We talk one moment
They say they care
Then we stop talkin'
I can not go on
I feel so alone
It's like you're all gone and never want to see me again
I know that's not the case
But that's not the point
The point is I'm in a bad place
And need your attention
Look, I'm fuckin' depressed
Got aggressions and anxiety
And just found out I probably got tourettes
Maybe even ADD
Got OCD, no question
And I'm constantly tryin' to work on betterin' myself
In an environment designed to destroy my mental health
Why am I distant?
Really?
Take a guess
I'm really fuckin' stressed
But I'm still tryin' my best to be a good friend
And check up on you
Do all the things I want you to do
To me that means a lot
Cause maybe you could ask me
If I want to have a call
If I want to meet up, maybe play Mario Kart
And yeah...
I know y'all are depressed too
Y'all got this and that too
There's more elements to it
I'm aware of the fact CoViD
Made everything a little more complicated
It's affected every single part of our communication
But why does that mean we gotta change
In a way that tears us apart
What happened to the family we said we are?!
The people closest to me feel so far away
Now you can think I'm overdramatic
And I didn't have to write a song
I could've just said it
But I did!
You forgot what happened?!
I had a full on breakdown and you just reacted
By not doin' what I said I need you to do
Maybe I got the meaning of friendship confused
But maybe it's just that my own conscious refused
To be logical about this situation again
I don't know if what I just said is fair to you
But I don't think I can deal with it anymore
My friends don't know me
Why am I so lonely?
My friends don't know me
They say they care
But show me nothin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
We talk one moment
They say they care
Then we stop talkin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
My friends don't know me
They say they care
But show me nothin'
(Why) am I so lonely?
We talk one moment
They say they care
Then we stop talkin'