For two long years my head hurt bad
So the doctor checked me an he shook his head
He said, "I'm sorry to tell you
But your body's outlived your brain"
He said, "I know this doctor in New York, son
And he'll fix you right up with a brand new one"
So the head doctor met me when I stepped down off of the train

He said, "We had this bank robber killed last night
His body's shot but his brain's alright
I'll give you a transplant, boy, and you'll be okay"
I got my new brain in and I was feelin' great
I went right back to Nashville with no headache
But something strange happened when I walked in the bank one day

I said, "Stick 'em up everybody, I'm robbin' this place
Drop all of your money in my guitar case
Don't nobody move and don't nobody reach for that door"
A lady said, "Why, you're Johnny Cash"
I said, "No ma'am, I'm the Manhattan Flash
And I am the best bank robber in New York"

Now the other night, Roy Acuff called me
He said, "John, I'd like for you to do the Opry
So I went out on the stage, but I couldn't sing"
I got into a half a verse of "I Walk The Line"
And something snapped in this head of mine
I yelled, "Stick 'em up
Give me your money, your watches and rings"

Well, I called New York and talked to that brain quack
I said, "Doc, I've gotta have my old brain back"
He said, "I'm sorry there, Mr. Cash, but I can't do that"
He said, "I put your brain in a chicken last Monday
He's singing your songs and makin' lots of money
And I got him signed to a ten-year recording contract"

Now, friends, if you see me walkin' down the street
Remember what you see ain't necessarily me
And if I try to hold you up, don't pay me no mind
But when you got ten bucks that you can blow
You oughta catch that Johnny Chicken show
He's doin' fairs and concert dates all up and down the line

I said, "Stick 'em up everybody, I'm robbin' this place
Drop all of your money in my guitar case
Don't nobody move and don't nobody reach for that door"
A lady said, "Why, you're Johnny Cash"
I said, "No ma'am, I'm the Manhattan Flash
And I am the best bank robber in New York"

Well, I don't pay any income tax
You don't pay tax on money you steal
You oughta catch that Johnny Chicken show
Chicken in black