Wish you'd talk more about yourself (Said no one ever)
Treat me to a motel (Said no one ever)
Show me your prison cell (Said no one ever)
Yeah, love is always real on reality TV
Sucks to be rich (Said no one ever)
Oh, I love politics (Said no one ever)
Make the beat more slick (Said no one ever)
My Heisman and my Grammy came so damn easy

I, I don't need your love and affection
Your undivided attention when we're together (we're together)
I, I don't need to be your one and only, I'm happier when I'm lonely
Don't want love to last forever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever

Bring back the payphone
Wait, who are The Rolling Stones? (Said no one ever)
More Drakkar cologne (Said no one ever)
Yeah, everybody here can't wait for Monday

I, I don't need your love and affection
Your undivided attention when we're together (we're together)
I, I don't need to be your one and only, I'm happier when I'm lonely
Don't want love to last forever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever

I wish you'd kiss me less, leave me hanging by a thread
Leave my heart in a mess, said no one ever
No one ever

I, I don't need your love and affection
Your undivided attention when we're together (we're together)
I don't need to be your one and only, I'm happier when I'm lonely
Don't want love to last forever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever
Said no one ever

Wish you'd talk more about yourself (said no one ever)
Treat me to a motel (said no one ever)
Show me your prison cell (Said no one ever)
Said no one ever
Whatever