I tried to hide it from the world me and my benzos
2023 I set intentions let go
Mind deranged I'm thinking probably under-age illicits
Sick of living life so shitty ticking coz I'm dead broke

Yeah the moneys up but doesn't mean the thoughts changed
Just coz the moneys up doesn't mean the thoughts changed
I remember times of sniffing lines of lots of horse tranq
I'm needing more change, Morbid is my raw state
Think I need to get redemption brah I'm on my shawshank

I remember times of carrying a short blade
Glad I changed my ways I could've hurt someone for short change

Used to blame my mental health so I could get more faded
Now I'm tryna get back to that place without being sedated

Back to the routine uh
These thoughts go blahblahblah
This gun go gratata
My mind go shalala
I dun ticked so much its time to
Get a new dealer
I wish I'd shut the fuck up
Like please just shut the fuck up

I like to think I have the answers But I dont
If I did wouldn't be useless and you'd think I'd learn to cope
It's just what my ego tells me
I know my health aint healthy
Every day I'm praying higher spirits will come help me

I need a fix it aint no bob
A couple sticks a couple dots
One fifty mics on every blot
The shit I think it be so wrong
Like I'm affixed on playing god
I guess it's how the story goes
Sick forms of trauma all you know
Like whatchu know about it

How I'm meant to know some different
When I'm stuck within these limits
try to hide I try to run
Push it aside with every drug
I bet that's probably sounding dumb
Well you got taught by dad and mum
And I got taught to take some drugs
And taught to hate the world

And don't you ever show no love
If you ain't gettin what you want
Then tell the person to get fucked

I was taught to burn the bridge
So then I turned to burning spliffs
Learning in lysergic trips
You tell I'm just a hurting kid
Like aint it obvious

I was born to love
But then my path got strayed as fuck
And now I'm tryna straighten up
Don't have the answer sway shut up

I flood the system
Mums a stripper
Dads a tripper
Sons a sinner
Figure that's a given
Kinda different
Might be trippin

Likely livid
Don't like livin
Broken liver
Broke and livid
So sinister
Look he's acting different
Sad has kissed him

Damage hidden
Happy mimic
Sad and cynic
Damn he's different
And he's smitten
Damage hitting
Like his dad is livin