CORNY
Hey there, Teenage Baltimore!
Don't change that channel!
'Cause it's time for the Corny
Collins Show! Brought to you by
Ultra Clutch Hairspray!

CORNY (& COUNCIL MEMBERS)
Ev'ry afternoon
When the clock strikes four
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)

A crazy bunch of kids
Crash through that door
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)

They throw off their coats
And leave the squares behind
And then they shake it, shake it, shake it
Like they're losing their mind
You'll never see them frown
'Cause they're the nicest kids in town

Every afternoon
You turn your T.V. on
(na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na)

And we know you turn the sound up
When your parents are gone, yeah
(na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na)

And then you twist and shout
For your favorite star
And once you've practiced every step
That's in your repertoire
You better come on down
And meet the nicest kids in town

Nice white kids
Who like to lead the way
And once a month
We have our "negro day!"
And i'm the man who keeps it spinnin' round
Mr. Corny Collins
With the latest, greatest Baltimore sound!!

So every afternoon
Drop everything
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)

Who needs to read and write
When you can dance and sing?
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)

Forget about your algebra
And calculus
You can always do your homework
On the morning bus
Can't tell a verb from a noun
They're the nicest kids in town

Roll Call!!

COUNCIL MEMBERS
I'm Amber!
Brad!
Tammy!
Fender!
Brenda!
Sketch!
Shelley!
IQ!
Lou Ann!
Joey!
Mikey!
Vikki!
Becky!
Bix!
Jesse!
Darla!
Polly!
Noreen!
Doreen!
And I'm...LINK!
(All of the girls scream.)

CORNY (& COUNCIL MEMBERS)
So, if every night you're shaking
As you lie in bed
(mony-mony, ooh, mony-mony)

And the bass and drums
Are pounding in your head
(mony-mony, ooh, mony-mony)
Who cares about sleep
When you can snooze in
School?

They'll never get to college
But they sure look cool
Don't need a cap and a gown
'Cause they're the nicest
Kids in town

They're the nicest. Nicest
They're the nicest, nicest
They're the sugar 'n' spicest,
The nicest kids in...
Kids in town!