Though the world is full of such wonderful things
We should all be as happy as...
But are we?
No
Definitely No
Positively No
Decidedly No
Uh ha

Short People Have Long Faces
And Long People have short faces
Big People have little Humour
and little people have no humour at all

And in the worlds of that immortal god
Samuel J Snograss
As he was about to be lead to the guillotine

Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Don't you know everyone wants to laugh?

My dad said "Be an actor, my son, but be a comical one."
They'll be standing in lines for those old honky-tonk monkeyshines
Now, you can study Shakspeare and be quite elite
And you could charm the critics and have nothing to eat
Just slip on a banana peel, the world's at your feet

Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh

Make em
Make 'em laugh
Don't you know everyone wants to laugh?

My grandpa said "Go out and tell them a joke, but give it plenty of hope"
Make 'em roar
Make 'em scream
Take a fall, butt a wall, split a seam

You start a fight pretending your a dancer with grace
Then you wiggle 'till they're giggling all over the place
Then you get a great big custard pie in the face

Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh

Make em
Make 'em laugh
Don't you know everyone wants to laugh?

Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh

Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh
Make 'em laugh