Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole many a man's soul and faith

And I was 'round when Jesus Christ
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Pilate
Washed his hands and sealed his fate

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game

I stuck around St. Petersberg
When I saw it was a time for a change
I killed the Czar and his ministers
Anastasia screamed in vain

I rode a tank
Held a general's rank
When the Blitzkrieg raged
And the bodies stank

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name, oh yeah
What's puzzling you is the nature of my game, oh yeah

I watched with glee as your kings and queens
Fought for ten decades
For the Gods they made

I shouted out
"Who killed the Kennedy?"
When after all
It was you and me

So let me please introduce myself
I'm a man of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for troubadours
Who get killed before they reached Bombay

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game, oh yeah

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
But what's puzzling you is just the nature of my game

Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails just call me Lucifer
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint

So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
Use all your well-learned politesse?
Or I'll lay your soul to waste, um yeah

Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game, oh baby

Oh yeah
Tell me baby, what's my name
Oh tell me honey, can you guess my name?
Oh oh oh oh
Tell me honey, what's my name
Oh, just the sweetest, tell me what's my name?
Tell me, sweetie, what's my name
Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah

(Oh oh oh)

Can papa get a holler now?