Lookin at my tragedy’s, dieter from my reality
Watching as my sanity, slippin’ I grab the vanity
I can feel gravity, weighing as if a hand on me
Talking to my family, hoping they understandin’ me
This is all the love in my heart, that I’m losing rapidly
I can feel the hate, as I remember yall abandon me
Tell me you love me, as I just suck on my teeth
Livin’ in the moment,
Cuz my future so much harder to see
Always worried I’ll be,
Succumbing to my inner darkness
Rolling far from the tree
Yet I’m still smoking the leafs
The doctor said it lethal, yet I’m finding relief
Still finding pride in my grief
Aimlessly lookin for the strength that I need
Yet I don’t fall to my knees
Religion just apart of all the trauma I breathe
Yet I’m faithfully committed to the problem I see
So used to overthinkin’ that problem was me
So I grabbed it by the root,
And now I’m planting the seed
Without the key ingredient
Narcissism and greed
Being left to believe
That if I wanna succeed
Then I gotta take a look at all the karma I reap
Yeah, this mountain is steep
I’ve been climbing for awhile,
Get a glimpse of the peak
For’ my feet slip, n now it harder to reach
Find it kinda funny, everyone of you preach
Yet not a single one of you have practiced a thing
Acting perfect,
Like there ain’t an ounce of guilt on your sleeve
Fake it, til you make it, always acting naive
This is just the way all my thoughts will perceive
All the lies and deceit,
Put on a platter for your family to eat
Lucky for you
I’m real accustomed to my greens
Always on bender, roll em up into threes
All I’m wanting is peace
Pulled out from under my feet
To fight a war of defeat
I didn’t leave cause,
I’m so caught up in my hatred for things
I really truly think, that I could make a difference
If I change the way I’m living
I’m running up all limits
Caught on to your superstitions
Approving my own permission
Ain’t looking to be forgiven,
Your love is an apparition
I never been into fiction
I’m hoping that you will listen
The status of my condition
Afflicting my inner vision
I love you, I hope you get this
Sincerely -my optimism