I gotta be honest
with me for the sake of development
Most the people I lost,
I done lost at the cost of embracing my selfishness
Convinced that I’m the chosen
Excuse my behavior
been telling the people i hurt
Every Genius is crazy
And my ********** use to say i was fucked to the point
Even therapy couldn’t even save me
I know I’m narcissist rocking
the cloak of selfless Soul
truth is i wanna be greater
But playing the part as a star
Means i sell my soul
isn’t much space to be comfortable
The gram make me look like I’m straight
In reality, the way that i live ain’t as wonderful
Ain’t enough drugs in this world
to take pain out my mind when
Consciousness cracking
Ain’t enough sluts in this world
Validating I’m him
Cause my confidence lacking
Ain’t enough funds in this world
Making up for the times
Where a promise ain’t happen
For them times that I gave folk my word
And reversed on the sentence that left my tongue
Ashamed of myself cause im pressed run
I hate how I act
blaming folks for my problems
Whenever the weight of the pressure comes
Not stabilized
initial mission was for changing lives
initial mission was for Me, ****, **** and **** live ourselves amazing lives
Chose myself over 80 times
And i won’t forget it
Instead linking folk who needed me
chose my own survival
And I don’t regret it

But i miss niggas
still think about my reckless days
Still thinking about em now
crazy folk is just a text a way
Lotta days i wanna patch it up
But ion even got the strength to say
My bad, I was wilding
Pride got me feeling childish

I know that i need to grow up in this bitch
But i know that i can’t change the past
I know i need time just to heal from a wound self inflicted from chasing this cash
I thought meeting Cole was the moment
That’d make this shit worth it
For all of the bad
But i met em, and felt fucking empty
And realized that happiness ain’t really last

Im starting to question what really matters
Telling myself every sacrifice made was a step
Toward the shit that we really after
Look around
Who the fuck left here to elevate
Outside of my CXR niggas,
i don’t got a day one left with me to celebrate
Gang activity
But due to my ego, i watched as the gang had to separate

Im learning to cope
learning my flaws
learning forgiveness for times I was lost
learning to give up control i desire
And placing my faith in the hands up above
learning to cherish the people i have
Im learning to let go of people that’s gone
learning the only way niggas prepare for the storm
Is confessing their sins through the calm

Fasho