Woke up this morning my laptop's dead
No internet I'm seeing red
Picked up the phone ready to shout
Tech support gotta figure it out
Press one for English two for despair
Stuck in a loop pullin' out my hair
Finally a voice but it's a machine
Lost in translation know what I mean?
It's the Tech Support Tango round and round we go
Talking to robots losing all control
Pressing all the buttons dancing in the dark
Tech Support Tango it's breaking my heart
Finally reached a person thought I'd won
But they're speaking jargon now I'm overdone
"Is it plugged in?" Yeah no joke
My patience is thin I'm about to choke
Tried to explain but they don't hear
Reading from a script it's crystal clear
"Reboot your router reset the modem"
Might as well tell me to read a totem
It's the Tech Support Tango round and round we go
Talking to robots losing all control
Pressing all the buttons dancing in the dark
Tech Support Tango it's breaking my heart
On hold for hours losing track of time
Listening to muzak it's a crime
Transferred three times no end in sight
Tech Support Tango gonna fight the fight!
They finally said "It's your ISP"
I'm screaming inside "Are you kidding me?"
Sent me a link it's all Greek
This Tech Support Tango's made me weak
Gave up the dance threw in the towel
Tech Support Tango you're so foul
Logged off for good went outside
Fresh air therapy no more tech ride
It's the Tech Support Tango round and round we go
Talking to robots losing all control
Pressing all the buttons dancing in the dark
Tech Support Tango it's breaking my heart
So here's to the struggle the endless woe
Tech Support Tango what a show
Next time my tech fails I'll just cry
Tech Support Tango you made me sigh!