Hi, I'm Lisa Schultz with CNN news
We're here at the presidential
Debate with Joanne Prada
The controversial Internet sensation
That stole the hearts of Americans worldwide
Joanne, the first question America would
Like to ask you is
With the economy in the toilet
What would you and your campaign
Do to fix it?

Now, listen up America
Miss Prada ain't ever been scared of ya
I give free drugs to trading tricks
I pop my pussy for Celery sticks
I drink and drive, fuck being alive
Kill everyone now, you won't survive
Our national anthem is Britney Spears
You're a terrorist if you shop at Sears
Instead of maths we teach kids to dip
There is no gender, sex means shit
Madonna fans are the upper class
And taxes, bitch, you can kiss my ass
Everyone gets on EPT, the only channel is BET
I'd burn The White House and kill the eagle
Oh, and tampons are illegal

Ah, a fine answer indeed, Miss Prada
Now, America's second question is
If you were inaugurated tomorrow
What would your first day in
The White House be like?
What would you do? Who would you bring?

Chris Brown is my first man
Karrueche goes in the trash can
I'd let Lindsay free
You can't fuck with me
I'm taking Bill from Hillary
All sex changes are free of charge
All murderers are now at large
Drop out of school and
Disrespect your parents
Am I gonna win? Bitch, it's apparent
I climbed the poles, they poked my holes
Chris Christy, he can lick my soles
Paris Hilton is VP, our water supply is FIJI
You gets free Gucci if you pops your coochie
On the money would be I Love Lucy
Every pet would be a fur coat
Every day would be a furlough

Ah, impressive now, as the quote "Baddest
Tranny in America"
The voters would like to know
What would you do for them?
How would you ensure their happiness
Is as important as yours seems to be?

I'll suck your balls, I'll lick your ass
I'll drink your piss from a wine glass
I'll fuck your dad, I'll fuck you bad
I'll bring my mower and cut your grass
I'll give your mother some compliments
I'll boost your step daughter's confidence
I'll come over to your house
And we can totally listen to Ashlee
Simpson and bond and junk
Vote for me, not Mike Huckabee
He smells like bleach and warm pee
And Jed Bush is a retard
He looks like a dyke at a gay bar
And Hillary? She's cool, whatever
But does she have her shit together?
How many licks does it take 'til you
Get to the centre of Prada? Bitch
You'll never

Very convincing argument miss Joanne Prada
Brava
Now do you have any last messages for voters?
Make it count
This is your last time to shine

Vote for Prada, bitch, vote for Prada
Vote for Prada, bitch, vote for Prada
Vote for Joanne, vote for Joanne
Vote for Joanne bitch, yes she can
Vote for Prada, bitch, vote for Prada
Vote for Prada, bitch, vote for Prada
Vote for Joanne, vote for Joanne
Vote for Joanne bitch, yes she can
Vote or gag, vote or gag
Vote or gag, vote, vote or gag
Vote or gag, vote or gag
Vote or gag, vote, vote or gag

Ladies and gentlemen
That was miss Joanne Prada
For the Democratic Party 2016
Make sure you get out there and register
Folks it's your country and your opinion
Is what makes it