Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and
Teach my younger self all the lessons I never really learned
I never really had anyone who was there for me in my childhood
I didn't really have any friends
My parents were unsupportive
And it almost killed me
But I never could have dreamed how much that would come to affect me in all my relationships
And the end result was that I hurt a lot of people before I came to terms with it
And I wish I'd turned things around sooner
I don't know that it'll ever be possible for me to really be good, deep down
The damage I caused, the pain I brought to others when I was young can never be undone
So now I'm just stuck wondering whether it's even possible to come back from this
Or if the lies I've spread and the hurt I've caused mean that I'm a bad person forever
And I know it's stupid
It's objectively dumb to get hung up on questions of legacy in this good versus bad, black or white way
But if that question of whether I'm good or not has no clear answer, then I don't really know why I'm still here
But, for better or worse, I am still here
And I have no choice but to keep on keeping on
Yknow?