VELMA
THOSE LIPS, THOSE EYES…

EDNA
…THAT FOOD!
WELL THERE AIN'T NOTHIN' LIKE A SPREAD TO GET YA IN THE MOOD

VELMA
OH WILBUR, CAN'T YOU FEEL THE BURNIN' FLAME OF HOT DESIRE
YOU'RE GONNA NEED MORE THAN SOME SELTZER TO PUT OUT THIS FIRE!

EDNA
I'M WAILIN', LOOK OUT OL' BALTIMORE

VELMA
I'M SELLIN' SOMETHING YOU CAN PURCHASE IN A 10 CENT STORE

EDNA
OH WILBUR, I FEEL LIKE A PRINCESS, COME ON AND TAKE ME TO THE BALL!

VELMA
I BET YOU'RE TIRED OF HEAVY LIFTING, GET YOUR HANDS ON SOMETHIN' SMALL!

EDNA
BECAUSE, I'M BIG…

VELMA
BLONDE…

BOTH
…AND BEAUTIFUL!
IT'S TIME TO FACE THE FACTS, ITS IRREFUTABLE

VELMA
WHY WASTE ONE MORE MINUTE?

EDNA
NOW I'M FEELIN' BRAND SPANKIN' NEW!

BOTH
HEY WILBUR, TAKE A LOOK IT'S ALL FOR…

VELMA: YOU

EDNA: YOU!?