Well, twirl my turban, man alive!
Here comes Mister Five by Five
He's one of those big fat bouncing boys
Solid avoirdupois!

Mister Five by Five
He's five feet tall and he's five feet wide
He don't measure no more from head to toe
Than he do from side to side

Mister Five by Five
Got fifty chins and a line of jive
He's a mellow old cat, a real hep fat
He be Mister Five by Five

That man
Can really jump it for a fat man
The only trouble is there's no way of knowin'
Whether he's comin' or, or goin'

Mister Five by Five
He's slightly plump on his butter side
He don't shake it no more from head to toe
Than he do from side to side

That man [my, my!]
Can really jump it for a fat man [fat man!]
Boys, the trouble is there's no way of knowin'
Whether he's comin' or, or goin'

Mister Five by Five
He's five feet tall and he's five feet wide
He don't measure no more from head to toe
Than he do
From side to side
Mister Five by Five