There was a school kidnapping
But he's awake now
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo
So I had to put my foot down
They say that power corrupts
But absolute power is even more fun
If it wasn't for venetian blinds
It would be curtains for everyone
A woman asked to check her balance
So the teller pushed her over
One of the cows didn't have milk today
It was an udder failure
If you see a crime at an Apple Store
does that make you an iWitness
The triangle says to the circle
you're pointless
Funny enough
When life gives you melons
you might be dyslexic
I don't understand
Two wifi engineers got married
The reception was fantastic
A woman asked to check her balance
So the teller pushed her over
One of the cows didn't have milk today
It was an udder failure
Forrest Gump set his password nice and simple
It was one forrest one
When you keep feeling someone is watching you
You're probably not alone
Despite the high cost of living
it remains popular
I thought I was indecisive
Now I'm not so sure
A woman asked to check her balance
So the teller pushed her over
One of the cows didn't have milk today
It was an udder failure
Funny enough
The skeletons didn't go to the haunted house
Because they just didn't have the guts
I thought about going on an all almond diet
But that's just nuts
A set of suspenders were arrested
For holding up a pair of pants
Pollen is what happens when flowers
can't keep it in their plants
What
A woman asked to check her balance
So the teller pushed her over
One of the cows didn't have milk today
It was an udder failure