Well hello my old friend
How very wonderful to see you again
And I'm sure this probably isn't quite the time or the place, but
What did you do to your face?

I mean, what's with the eyes
You look like everything's a total surprise
Like a hyper little hunting dog about to give chase
What did you do to your face

Cause your nose is so small now
So teeny tiny how do you breathe at all
And your lips, balloons
Overinflated like a pair of pontoons

You look weird
You look, good
You don't look anything like anyone should
Cept for people from Los Angeles or deep outer space
What did you do to your face

And you've smoothed your brow
You got it flatter than Nevada somehow
And your chin's tucked in
So much your boobs go up whenever you grin

Well, you're right
I'm a jerk
If you don't mind me asking, who did your work
Do you think there's any chance that he'd consider my case

What did you do to your face
And was it painful
What did you do to your face
Was it expensive
What did you do to your face
Would you go with me
What did you doodley doodley do to your face"