I would say that my words escaped me, but that would mean I’d have to have them in the first place
And it’s been years since my mind went unfiltered by trauma, my conscience, and social grace
I wish I could tell you all I’m feeling, but a feeling’s the only thing that I have
I miss the untrained me that I was, I want my deep, introspective, emo middle-schooler mind back
It’s just a silly little trauma response that I’ve been so numb for a few years
Don’t worry about it, it’ll all be gone once I move out and have no fears
And once my life is stable, then I’ll be finally able
To live my life without these fears, just have to wait a few more years
Wish I could find a way to articulate everything that everyone has ever meant to me
But it’s been years since my mind went unfiltered by trauma and social conditioning
I wish I could tell you the whole story, but lately I’m ashamed of the couth that I lacked
I didn’t used to care so much. Want my pathetic, self-pitying emo middle-schooler mind back
It’s just a silly little trauma response that I’ve been so numb for a few years
Don’t worry about it, it’ll all be gone once I move out and have no fears
And once my life is stable, then I’ll be finally able
To live my life without these fears, just have to hide a few more years
I wish I could love somebody without the constant fear that I’m being lied to
But it’s been years and I’m still suspicious of every single person that I talk to
I think my problem is I can’t decide which way I really wanna live
I don’t know if ignorance is bliss but I want my hopelessly romantic emo middle-schooler mind back
It’s just a silly little trauma response that I’ve been so numb for a few years
Don’t worry about it, it’ll all be gone once I move out and have no fears
And once my life is stable, then I’ll be finally able
To live my life without these fears
Dang it, I’ve wasted all my years